I'm starting to freak out

My ultrasound is on Thursday. I know that spotting is supposidly normal but I'm really worried. I spotted on Feb 19th 9dp3dt, Feb 25th 14dp3dt (talked to the nurse and she said it was fine as long as there was no cramping and its brownish in color, which it is), and today 25dp3dt. I have taken a pregnancy test a few days ago and it still came back positive. I haven't had cramping but twinges on and off, honestly not sure if it gas/digestive twinges. I just want to see my bean(s). I want to make sure this is all really real.

What a day

I went this morning at 8:30am for the bloodwork. My plan for the day was to "work from home" so I would be in a private setting when I got my results. My doctor had put on the req form "need results STAT". I was sitting in the little chair waiting and I overheard the nurse ask what test are on the list of stat. Then she named off what I was getting tested for in front of the 15 people in the waiting area to overhear including other patients. Number one upset point of the day. She came over and I quitely explain that I this was a test that needed the results today and she said "in your head you think its important that they come today". WTF?!?! Then I explained that it was important that I get the results and what the test was for she didn't seem to care. I asked her if I went to another lab would it be done faster she said no. She then said an STAT test is for someone who is having a diabetic coma and the doctor needs the results in an hour (I assume that someone in that situation would no go to a walk in blood lab) but my test would be run today and the doctor would get the results today. I asked what time the blood was being picked up and she told me 10am. I just let it be at that point.

When I was on my way home from the lab(the blood lab is 5 minutes from my house) a big truck rear ended me. I'm fine and the other guy is fine, but it caused a 2.5 hour delay in my day. Phone calls with insurance and just putting a bad spin on the day.

To top it all off its now 6:00pm the nurses from my clinic have all gone home and I still don't have the results. I know I'm pregnant becuase if the POAS results I've been getting but I just want the beta numbers.

FML

Dark pink

I'm so excited that the line is getting darker pink it makes me feel relief that its easier to detect now.

I want to scream it out loud that we're expecting. We'll tell our family after we get the beta numbers on Thursday. Its so hard to keep this from everyone who has been supporting us through this process.

I POAS'd yesterday...

at 9dp3dt...

Two lines!!! I know we are so lucky that on our first try we got a BFP. I was going to wait until Monday originally but it just felt right to do it yesterday. I came out of the bathroom and J was struggling to get out of bed and was lying down with his eyes closed. I put it in front of his face and told him to look. I honestly don't think that he really knew what he was looking at so I explained that 2 lines is a good thing. Then J felt like he had to POAS himself. I think it was his way of comparing the two tests since it is a faint line (it shows better in person than in these pics). He joked that he's been feeling really PMSy the pat few days so he doesn't think its his month...lol. I love him and his sense of humor.

I did have brown bleeding yesterday but none through the night last night or this morning. I sign I am taking at implantation bleeding. I had 5 minutes of freaking out then relaxed about it.

Here is this mornings at 10dp3dt...

I'm going to keep POAS at least until the beta on Thursday.

Thank you for everyone who have been following and routing for me.

7dp3dt

Its been a week so far....the 1/2 way point.

My boobs hurt a lot. J actually said they look bigger today. No touchy!!!

I've been having a few odd feelings in my abdomen for the past 2 days. I don't know how to describe the feeling. It feels like a pulse. Then my tummy feels tender likes its bruised but not. Like I just did 50 crunches but not. Like I said...I don't know how to explain the feeling. Every now and then I'll get a twinge but nothing really painful.

I kept forgetting to contact the clinic to get the report on how the embryos did through the freeze. I did yesterday. She said all 12 made it. Hun? If you've been reading my past post...the doctor told us we had 10 after the transfer. What I didn't know and he didn't elaborate was that there were 2 that were a bit slower than the others that they let go to blast. So we have 12 waiting for us!

I really miss my bathtub. I usually take a bath every second day and soak while reading a book. I miss it but I hope its worth it.

I want to POAS...wait I know its too soon. However, Monday will be 11dpt. Monday is also a holiday called "Family Day" where I live. The research that I have found say that it is possible to detect on 11dpt.

Should I?